Oh jeez, I'm screwed

You just know any child of mine is going to be trying shit like this with me.

--Adam

Adam Has Spawned

Yes, it's true, the fruit of my loins now walks the earth. Well, not walking really, more just laying around eating, pooping and crying when she sees my face. Adam is now officially a father and I'm just as frightened for my child and you are for her as well. I'm sure that one day she will take my place as the craziest person all her friends know that can hold down a job and is invisible in a crowd. Visit this link if you wish to see more disgusting photos.

--Adam

P.S. Actually I'm really happy to be a new parent and I'm sure my baby is going to grow up to be an extraordinary person if I can manage not to screw her up.

Pronto Condoms; Get It On, Pronto

As if sex wasn't fun enough already, there is now a new twist that looks like it could make it even better. Just don't try and keep this condom in your wallet. I don't think that would turn out well.

--Adam